Good morning,
My best friend from high school is maybe the smartest person I know.
He’s an astrophysicist at a prestigious university and is highly-skilled as a home handyman, musician, painter and more.
Years ago, while admiring the expansive built-in bookshelves at his home, I noticed bunches of Jack Reacher books. I’d never read Lee Child, but from the covers and hearing the name “Jack Reacher” before, I gathered these were mass-market thrillers sold at Walgreens and airports.
What do you like about these books? I asked. He said they were his favorite books to read. He said they helped to reset his mind – the stories took him outside of the realm of his intense work as a teacher and researcher. I felt a mixture of surprise and pretension. When I met my friend A (we were sophomores in high school), we bonded over bands and movies and other general interests, but I never thought we’d bond over this genre of book.
Lately, I’ve checked out and read a few books by an author similar to Lee Child after seeing his name appear a few times on my iPad’s screen.
I first noted Harlan Coben’s name while surfing Netflix’s home page; a new series was recently adapted from one of his books and sat atop their most viewed shows in the U.S. Then, in one of the last episodes in a silly but worthwhile sitcom on Netflix called Loudermilk, a character working at a vintage clothing store had a copy of a Harlan Coben book sitting on the counter by the register. The pop culture references in Loudermilk were one of the best parts of the show (along with the quirky ensemble cast and Peter Farrelly’s style of humor), and I thought that if the show’s creators decided to prominently feature a book by Coben, he must be pretty good.
Over the last couple weeks I’ve read two books (“Fool Me Once” and “The Stranger”) and just checked out two more (currently reading “The Match”). Most days I’m counting down til bedtime so I can dive into these serpentine mystery thrillers. What I love about the books, in addition to being entertaining page-turners, is how the plight of the characters remind me of my own humanity as well as the people around me. In a strange way, these mass market books make me feel more compassionate to people I know as well as strangers I encounter.
Last night a friend texted me a picture of a compassion exercise he’d come across. Here’s what the card said (it’s from ReSurfacing®: Techniques for Exploring Consciousness by Harry Palmer):
Objective:
To increase the amount of compassion in the world.
Expected Result:
A personal sense of peace.
Instructions
This exercise can be done anywhere that people congregate (airports, malls, parks, beaches, etc.). It should be done on strangers, unobtrusively, from some distance. Try to do all five steps on the same person.
Step 1
With attention on the person, repeat to yourself:
"Just like me, this person is seeking some happiness for his/her life."
Step 2
With attention on the person, repeat to yourself:
"Just like me, this person is trying to avoid suffering in his/her life."
Step 3
With attention on the person, repeat to yourself:
"Just like me, this person has known sadness, loneliness, and despair."
Step 4
With attention on the person, repeat to yourself:
"Just like me, this person is seeking to fulfill his/her needs."
Step 5
With attention on the person, repeat to yourself:
"Just like me, this person is learning about life."
I’m continuously surprised how things I find today link up to memories of experiences from years ago (including my foray into “self-help stuff” when I went to a weekend-long Avatar seminar, which is what this compassion exercise seems to have derived from). I’m also reminded that small interactions with others, or exposure to things in random situations (i.e., a couple Coben placements in the ocean of Netflix) can shift my life in new directions.
What’s new in your life? What’s linking up to things from years before? Who or what is all of this connecting you to?
Until next time,
Matt